Week 5 Story: Runaway Tales

Runaway Tales

(Photo by Gavin Clarke, 2009)

     Story

    Once upon a time, there was a real seedy New York dive bar. In this bar sat a scrawny little man. He couldn't have weighed more than 140 pounds. His arms were like toothpicks and his glasses were most definitely tortoise shell. Needless to say, he looked a bit out of place. Naturally, when a guy looks that out of place, he gathers some attention. A couple of real tough looking dudes gathered around the man as he drank his drink. These guys were big. They easily topped 200 to 250 pounds and it was all muscle. They crack their knuckles and ask the gentleman what he thinks he's doing here. So, the gentleman with the tortoise shell glasses addressed the big men in leather jackets and offered to tell them a story. They were curious as to what made this kid think he could hang here. Being the ever understanding men that they were, they sat down for a listen. "Alright yous guys. Here it goes," said the man.

    "There I was. I'm minding my own business as I walk down the street looking for a bite. I see this Vietnamese place down through an alleyway," the man tells the crowd. "I like Vietnamese is what I say to myself." "So, I start heading down this alleyway. Just as I'm about to exit out the other end, this big dude in all black steps out in front of me," the man continues. "He looked a lot like one of yous guys now that I think about it." "Was it Joey?" one of the men asked. This man promptly received a smack to the head from his neighbor. "Shut up and let him finish," said the clear disciplinarian of the group. 

    "Anyways, the man tells me 'Hey kid, you're on the wrong side of the tracks.' and then glares at me real hard." The men lean in slightly. "I said, 'Hey man there aren't any tracks anywhere near here.' He didn't like that very much." "He grabbed me by the shirt and lifted me two feet off the ground. I thought that was it. I'm dead." "And then what?" the group asked in unison. "Well, with my eyes closed and ass cheeks clenched, I suddenly hear someone yell 'Hey!' from down the alleyway." The men lean in slightly more. "Both me and the big dude turn to find three dudes walking down the alleyway. One of the men was leading a deer, another had two big, black dogs walking beside him and the third didn't have an animal but boy did he look like he had seen some shit." The man drinks a bit of his beer. "So, the guy puts me down. My death is delayed slightly." The men in the bar give a slight cheer. "Settle down. Settle down. I'm not done yet." "So the guy with the deer speaks up first and he says 'Hey man, is this kid really worth it? I mean look at him.  He probably can't even lift himself out of bed with those scrawny arms.'" The men in the bar all laugh and gesture to the man's tiny arms. "Yeah yeah it's a real hoot. Laugh it up ya jabronies," said the man in response, slightly annoyed with having to relive the insult. The men slowly come back to the story and stop laughing. 

    "Anyways, the guy with the deer says to the big man who wants to take my life for a bit of sport 'Listen pal, if the three of use can tell you some interesting stories, would you let the kid go?" "Now, I'm thinking that we're all dead. I mean, this dude doesn't really look like the story type. But, then again, here yous guys are." The men shrug and nod in agreement. "So, the guy agrees," continues the man. "He puts me down next to him and turns to the other three gentleman. The first guy starts his story." The man takes the final drink of his beer and puts a five next to the glass. "What was the guys story?" the men asked excitedly. "I dunno. I didn't stick around to find out. As soon as they had his attention, I booked it." The men all look at each other in disappointment and confusion. They turn back to where the man was sitting. The barstool is empty and still spinning. They look at the door and see the last scrap of the man's coat disappear.

    The group turn to the bartender. "Why'd you let him run outta here? You saw that we were eagerly awaiting the ending of that tale." The bartender shrugs. "How about I tell you a better story? One with a proper ending," said the bartender. The big, leather jacketed men settle up to the bar and patiently await their tale. "Let me just go grab something from the back..."

Author's Notes

    I started with The Story of the Merchant and the Genie as told by Scheherazade. In the original story, Scheherazade is telling this story in order to bide her time with a wife murdering sultan. She tells the story of a man who accidentally kills a genie's son and the genie tells him he must die for it. The man gets one year to organize his life and then he has to come back and die. While waiting for the genie to show up and kill him, three men show up and here his tale. When the genie arrives, they bargain three really interesting stories in exchange for the man's life. The genie agrees. They succeed and the man goes home alive.

    In my story, Scheherazade to a guy in a bar. He is still biding time for his own safety through storytelling. Even if it isn't quite as fantastical or interesting. My character tells the story as a personal encounter. The genie is now a big bully type. I left the three men and their accompanying animals the same. The major change I made was the way in which my character makes his escape. Instead of being saved by the storytellers, he uses them to give him a chance to run away. He then uses this same technique to escape his predicament at the bar and never quite learns his lesson to stay away from places he doesn't belong. 

Bibliography. The Story of the Merchant and the Genius from The Arabian Nights' Entertainments by Andrew Lang
The Story of the First Old Man and of the Hind from The Arabian Nights' Entertainments by Andrew Lang
The Story of the Second Old Man, and of the Two Black Dogs from The Arabian Nights' Entertainments by Andrew Lang